Emma Joann Hildebrand

Oh goodness, where do I even begin..

This may or may not be too much information to share.  Read at your own risk.

As you probably already know, we became a family of four on Friday, June 15 at 11:46pm.  And I will now be able to stop complaining about pregnancy on my blog, so you can all breathe a sigh of relief.

Betsy and I had decided on Tuesday when I got home from my midwife appointment-- and were both disappointed I wasn't progressing quicker-- that if "Bob" hadn't started to make any indication of an arrival, Betsy would help try and stir some things up to see if we could get labor moving on Friday.  Friday morning before work, I went over to Betsy's and she stripped my membranes for me, and we discussed the days plans.  I headed home, Jesse and I got ready for work and off we went.  Around 1p, I sent Betsy a text telling her my Braxton Hicks were getting stronger and much closer together, and she put our babysitters on alert.  I took a nap, rested, changed positions, drank a ton of water, did dishes and tried to straighten the house: the typical things that should kill Braxton Hicks contractions, plus things that would help get the house/me ready for if this was the real thing.  I don't remember times of everything, but I/Betsy decided this was going to be the real thing and Lily and I headed to the Partin's around 4p so I could labor there and Lily would be able to play with the kids once the sitters arrived.  Mom and Dad had already sent Mom on her way, I told Jesse I thought this was the real thing, and I had the hospital stuff in the car.

Jesse finally moseyed on over from work-- after he had gone home to change (per my instruction, I hadn't packed him any clothes) and talk to the boys haying our meadow (per his decision, I apparently hadn't told him this was urgent)-- and off we went to the hospital.  I think we arrived somewhere in the ballpark of 6p?  

When we arrived, Jesse asked if I wanted a wheelchair or for him to park and we could walk in.  When I was in labor with Lily, he parked and we walked in and had to hunt all over the place for a wheelchair, so I asked that he drop me off and find a wheelchair before parking.  As we pulled up, a nurse who had just brought a mom and new baby down from the baby floor was getting ready to head back upstairs, so she just took me with her, and told Jesse to check me in.  When we arrived in triage..somewhere..everyone was all confused about who I was and where I had come from, since I hadn't been checked in.  There was a flurry of activity and they finally got things figured out and quickly grasped that I was in serious labor and they should probably admit me and get me upstairs.  I don't remember much of this part, just a lot of activity, Jesse showing up and Betsy arriving just was we were leaving.  I seem to remember making the nurses laugh, but I don't remember what was so funny.

Once in our room, the "fun" began.  Ugh.  I don't think that this labor was "easier" than it was with Lily, but several things did make it more tolerable, I suppose, if that's a word that can be used in the same sentence as labor:

1.  It didn't last 48 hours (including pre labor).

2. I was able to focus on other things during each contraction-- a) this is only going to last 30-60 seconds and I get a break, and b) to relax my muscles instead of tensing up [this one was incredibly helpful, actually].

3. I knew I was roughly 6 cm dilated by the time I got into our room, so I knew I only had 4 to go, and how long could that take?

When I was in labor with Lily, each contraction made her heart rate fluctuate (I think, is that right, Betsy?), so the midwife wanted me to have an oxygen mask, or be in a different position than sitting/laying on my back, anything other than what I found most "comfortable."  I didn't want to change positions at ALL with Lily.  This time, I felt like I was all over the place, and able to handle the thought of worse contractions with the position changes.  I sat in the bed, rolled on a birthing ball, laid on my side, sat on the ball in a shower, stood in the shower, etc.  While I was rolling on the ball at one point, Betsy asked how big we all thought the baby would be.  Jesse confidently threw 9lbs, 2oz out there, and I gave him a death glare: there was NO WAY our kid was going to be that big, I refused.  I really thought I was just about ready to push and was kind of upset my mom hadn't arrived yet when Dawn (the midwife) checked me and announced I was only at 8cm.  Since I thought I was getting ready to push, the new really upset me and I started crying, just not able to grasp I was only at 8.  Mom arrived shortly after, and I continued laboring.

the death glare

We finally got to 9cm, and my water still hadn't broken.  Laying on my back, Dawn and Betsy encouraged me to start pushing anyway, letting me judge when the time came as to when I needed to start pushing and figuring my water would break.  The worst part came at this point: 9cm, pushing through contractions, and my body decided it was time to get rid of everything I had and hadn't eaten in the past 24 hours and I threw up everywhere.  Throwing up is misery by itself: it should NOT be allowed during labor.

Dawn went ahead and broke my water and after a position change to my hands and knees and pushing ridiculously hard-- you know you're pushing hard when you burst a blood vessel in your eye..-- "Bob's" identity was revealed!  I heard someone shout "it's a girl!," Jesse tell the room "Emma Joann" and looked down to a baby being passed up under me to see.  They helped me roll over with my little girl and they went to work on her while I just stared and cuddled.  Eventually the nurses had to take Emma to finish cleaning her up and weighing her, after promising they would return her quickly.  When they announced 9lbs 10oz, my jaw dropped, and I wish someone had gotten a picture of my reaction.  No wonder I felt like such a whale!!  It wasn't just muscle memory on my body's part, I really WAS that big!

We got to come home on Monday.  Emma had to stay at the hospital a full 48 hours because I had tested positive for Group B Strep, and just when I thought I would get to go home, the nurses came in to tell me that Emma was too jaundiced to be released.  The pediatrician said he would have let her go home at a blood count of 8 or 9 (I know very little about jaundice, so I'm not really sure too much except that it has to do with the bilirubin count) and that Emma was at 19.5.  So we had to stay an extra day so she could sunbathe under the lights.  I wanted to be at home with Lily and my new little family so badly that I was devastated and cried some more.  By the end of the day of absorbing the lights, we were released and headed home.

she eventually really enjoyed this and sprawled out

It has been a rough few days, of course, but I will blog about our adjusting next time.  I will say that Lily LOVES her sister, but is having a hard time with  not being my whole world right now.  The past two mornings have been pretty tough for me-- having to do with being tired, trying to handle a newborn and Lily and just being a super emotional wreck-- but the afternoons have been awesome after Lily's naps, in general.  I know I'm short tempered right now and pretty grumpy, but we are all surviving!  Mom and Dad are here and a huge help right now, so we are thankful and (mostly) happy.

I feel so blessed to have the friends and family support that I do, and that I had such an awesome midwife to help deliver Emma.  You know that your people love you when they see you at your absolute worst, throw up on them, and still tell you that you're a champ and your baby is cute.  And if you're Betsy, tell you that she's such a cute chunky monkey and even her "rolls have rolls."  It's true.  

Ok, I need to sleep, more later.  And I'm not proof reading this, so sorry for incorrect spelling, scattered thoughts, poor layout..